I’ve gone back and forth for a really long time about whether or not to write a post about my acne. My skin, and my issues with it, has always been by far my biggest insecurity. As a preteen I had clear skin, then one day, my day came and my skin took a turn for the worst.
I then proceeded to struggle, and I mean really struggle, with self-esteem issues. If you’d like to know the dirty details of my struggle with acne, keep reading, sh*t is going to get real.
Having acne is such a soul-sucking, self-confidence-crushing, debilitating issue that affects so many of us. Some people get it in the form of severe cystic, painful acne, and some get it in the form of a zit on their chin once in a while. Either way, when we feel that painful spot growing under the skin, that red little monster ruining our complexion, we are NOT happy about it.
A few facts about acne:
- 95% of people will experience acne at some point in their lives
- Americans spend over 1.4 billion dollars on acne treatments annually
- 50% of adult women and 26% of adult men suffer from acne
Needless to say, acne is a widespread medical issue and it’s very difficult to get rid of/nearly impossible to cure. The best way to eliminate acne and the accompanying insecurities is to find the best way to control it. It’s so easy to fall into every single ‘best new thing’ skincare fad that promises crazy results at an attractive price.
I can’t tell you how many of these skincare products, lines, regimens, etc I’ve jumped into for the sole purpose of clearing up my acne. I’ve definitely flipped flopped from one fad to the next, not being consistent and getting discouraged when a product wouldn’t give me clear skin overnight.
The Initial Struggle
When I first started having acne as a teenager, I very quickly started picking at my skin. Not realizing what I was doing nor how detrimental to my future skin that would be, I obsessively kept at it.
I’ve done many things over the years to avoid seeing myself in the acne-covered skin I so hated, such as covering up the mirror in my bedroom, doing my makeup in the dark/semi-darkness. I was so ashamed of having these things on my face that I would make sure that no one, including me, could see them. Sometimes I wouldn’t even leave my bedroom without having applied some sort of covering makeup product.
It took me so long to get to a point where I was comfortable enough to even venture out of my house without makeup, and to be honest, that point didn’t happen until about a couple years ago. Until then I would always apply a full face of foundation in order to go outside.
Where I Am Now
Today I am sitting here on my balcony in beautiful 26-degree weather, thinking about going for a walk or venturing into town and I have no plans whatsoever of applying makeup on my face. I have a couple breakouts, and I have no doubts that I will in some way always deal with some sort of pesky little skin demon. However, I am at a point now where I feel comfortable and confident in myself enough to go makeup free and to not let a breakout or several ruin my day, week or even month.
Part of this change has come from a better skincare regimen, my skin being a little clearer, but mostly realizing that if I don’t want to ‘have’ to put on makeup to go to the grocery store, then I don’t. That’s it. Simple as that. People will not care one way or another if I am barefaced or have full on glam makeup at the store. If I feel good about my appearance then that’s literally all that matters. The first time I ventured out makeup free I was shaking in my boots, convinced that everyone was staring at me and judging me. However, nothing happened, no one made any comments, no one cared. And I felt FREE! It was such a great feeling to have accomplished and overcome something that has held me down for so many years.
Don’t get me wrong, I haven’t foregone my makeup collection, I still wear makeup to go out or for work or other occasions because it does make me feel good and I love the creative aspect of applying makeup, but I no longer use it as a shield.
I decided to share my journey here because I felt that I am surely not the only person who has felt such shame and who has struggled with their skin since their teenage years. I am so happy about where I am today and hoping someone out there will be able to relate to this.
I will follow this post up with more details about how I cleared my skin and the products I’ve been going back to. For now, let me know down bellow how you’ve dealt with your skin insecurities or any other insecurity and let’s create a helpful positive space in the comments.
Have a wonderful rest of your day!
This is the first time I’ve posted a bare faced photo anywhere on social media and that is also scary but it just feels so damn good !